NO: Good Joke: A Hakka Auntie

This is an old time joke we used to tell our new friends. We recalled this when few of my old buddies and I gathered together yesterday. This story is using some harsh Hakka language that might irritate some people.

There was an old Hakka lady who did not know any other language other than hakka. One fine day, she went overseas taking a flight to England just to visit his son working in a horse stable. When she reached there in the morning, there is an old Englishman came forward and greet her: “Good Morning.”;
“Ha?” the Hakka ah soh (auntie) didn’t get what the guy said and looked at him strangely;
“GOOD MORNING!” the Englishman thought she was too old to hear properly and he started to raise his voice;
“Ha, GOT MA LIN??? (cut off the horse pennies in Hakka)” she asked;
“YES! GOOD MORNING!!!!” the guy started to shout.
Then the ah soh started to panic and quickly ran to the horse in the stable and cut off the horse pennies while still doubt in her mind: Why the people here in England likes to ask visitor to do such thing one?
“SHIT!! Why you cut off my horse pennies!!??” the Mat Salleh (Englishman) really shouted at her and chase her off the stable….

The old Hakka lady ran away with frustration and took a British Airline flight coming back to Malaysia. When she was on board, as usual, the young British stewardess stepped forward and asked, “Madam, what drink would you like to have?”
ah soh saw other people getting a drink so she replied in Hakka: “NGAI OI CHIANG JIP (I want orange juice)”;
“Sorry, mdm, I can’t understand you” the stewardess looked at her;
“NGAI OI CHIANG JIP” ah soh said again;
“Sorry, I really didn’t get what you were saying, can’t you speak English?;
“OH LIN XI !!” the ah soh started to be inpatient and threw out these foul words;
“Oh I see, Orange!” stewardess got her the orange juice finally.

Finally, the ah soh got back to Malaysia and went back to Sg. Siput. When she passed by the river, she saw an Indian struggling in the water: “HELP!” the Indian saw her and shouted her for help. The Hakka ah soh asked, “NI HEL YU SUI MAO? (do you know swimming in Hakka)”;
Off course the going to be drown guy didn’t understand Hakka and can only shouted louder, “HELP!!!”;
“NI HEL YU SUI XI BO? (you really know how to swim?)”;
“HEEELP!!!”“HEL JIU HAO LO (then it’s fine)” the old Hakka lady walked away……..